Why its bad to have a Kung-Fu Wife

Marriage is a difficult union oftentimes marked by verbal fights and make-up sex. For a Chinese photographer known as Mr. Zhang, however, marriage has instead been a chance for him to practice being a punching bag for his Kung-Fu wife.


Things weren’t always like this for Zhang. In fact, his parents say that he and his wife are a perfect fit. Plus, Zhang himself admits to being attracted to his wife’s “strong and independent temperament.”


It all started one day due to an argument, after which Zhang’s enraged fiance went off on him with a lifetime’s worth of training in Kung Fu. “Before we got married, she had a wild hairstyle and I teased that it made her look like a tigress. During the argument that followed, I said some bad words and I got a taste of her kung fu for the first time,” said Zhang.


Since then, Zhang has been a constant target for his wife’s internal rage, suffering approximately three beat-downs per week.


He tries hard to avoid arguing, but Zhang — like every other man in the known Universe — is just unable to keep his trap shut and let his wife take the victory. Instead, he pushes forward with his opinion, but only to be subsequently thrashed around like a sock puppet.


His wife lamented, “I don’t want to beat him, but arguments are inevitable and I can’t help myself.”


Finally fed up with being knocked around by his wife, Zhang wrote up a contract that will force his wife to go away for three days to her parents’ home everytime that she lays an inappropriate finger on him. Zhang noted, “She is very obedient to her parents, and her parents will support me and blame her.


Will the contract work? Apparently, it doesn’t matter because Zhang says, “Despite all the beatings, I still love her.” In the immortal words of Tina Turner, what’s love got to do with it?

I dont know what kind of reverse Ike and tina crap this is.  What kind of man has to call his wifes parents cause she wont stop beating his ass?  And out of all the ass whoopings, he aint never thought to take lessons and then one day flip it on her ass and karate chop her in the face? I mean damn!